The Last Truck Stop
by No One Reads Bad Fanfics
Summary: He'd always be her Chu-Chu Chuck. Bittersweet ChuckBlair. CHAPTER FIVE UP.
1. One

**The Last Truck Stop**

**Story Summary:** He'd always be her Chu-Chu Chuck. Bittersweet ChuckBlair.

**Genre:** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Time Stamp:** Written May 19th; Updated May 21st, 2008.

**Rating:** T/PG-13

* * *

**Author's Starting Notes:** Before people ask, the Chu-Chu Chuck thing, yeah, totally mine. Just thought of that today while laughing it up with my little homie. She's awesome, she's like thirteen but really cool… for an eighth grader, LOL, JK. I just saw the season finale of GG and I swear, if you do not want to know about it, stay the hell away from my profile. It is about to be like dedicated to the season finale. Scrapping mostly everything I had before. Oh, and I changed the poll at the top of my profile, same basic idea yet very different…. Weird, so, now, you may read.

* * *

**One:**

It's the end of the line. Every single thing in the world must come to an end eventually. They are no different. The sulking clouds cover the midnight moon cloaking the two loan figures under the stars. The night is so quiet, so calm, the two people are whispering as if to save the serenity.

"So… this is it?" she asks gazing up from her peep-toe pumps towards the boy before her. He stares intently into the surrounding area careful not to look at her. If he did, his stance would surely falter.

"Yeah, it is," he says sullenly

The tears find their way to the back of her throat and she blinks them back forcefully. She's stronger than that. She's had plenty of break-ups previously. This one is no different. It makes no difference that he is probably the most brilliant person she's ever known. It doesn't even occur to her that he's the only guy who hasn't left her at some point or another. And, it's certainly irrelevant the amount of hours he put into reviving her self-image after she had yet another break down a few months prior. She could not care less about him. No really, it's hard to stop caring about a person you lo-like.

"How are we going to do this? Stay friends I mean. We've been together for so long…"

"Not that long, just a few months really,"

"Thirteen months, two weeks, and four days,"

"Actually, I think it's five days,"

"Yeah, you're probably right,"

No, he _is_ right. He's always right. He was right about Nate and Serena, about her parents, and even right about Eric. Why wouldn't he be right now?

"This won't change anything, between us. We're still going to hang out… when I fly in from California of course. That is, if you haven't already found some new guy from downtown like S, and I haven't found myself a nice little beach bunny, ha!"

Her lip begins to tremble and she finds herself launching into his arms sooner rather than later. He catches her as if he was expecting it and holds her as she sobs into him. She's been holding it in for so damn long. He's leaving. He's moving to the other side of the country leaving her behind like so many men have done before him. She's always the one left barely standing on her own two feet as everyone else goes running after their dreams, their ambitions, their futures. She just can't keep it inside anymore.

"Please, don't go," she whispers into his soaked shirt. It is a futile effort, she knows. He has to go for school. That doesn't mean she's okay with it though.

"I have to," he says back

"No, you don't," she urges pulling away from him slightly, "You can stay here, with me. We don't have to be apart. You can move into the penthouse. We can hirer some tutors and-and what about our life together? What about the good times you promised me? What's going to happen to those?"

"They're going to have to wait," he concludes dejectedly, "I won't get anywhere without an education. California offers what I need,"

"But what about me? I thought you needed me, wanted me… loved me,"

"I do love you," he says before she can go any further, "I love you with all my heart. You're my world, B. However, I'm not going to live in my world much longer. Senior year is right around the corner and I need to have something waiting for me that is stronger than love. I need security,"

She laughs in spite of herself retching away from the man she cares for so deeply. How can he say all of this-this shit? It's nothing but the lies his father programmed into him. He doesn't want that. She knows him, better than he knows himself, but he won't listen anymore. He's beyond reasoning. He's beyond what she can handle.

"Fine," she finally says upon realizing how insane she must look

"B-"

"I'm _fine_. You're fine, California is fine, and us breaking up is so _fucking_ fine!" She looks at him with such hatred and loathing that he feels like his heart could stop, "I thought you were different, Chuck. I thought you would be there for me, forever and for always. Then, now, and forever, remember?"

She pulls up the chain she wears around her neck and he winces shamefully. Memories of the fine occasion flooded back to him engulfing his person in the days of yesteryear.

* * *

_It was their one-year anniversary. It was a surprise to everyone they had lasted that long. Chuck Bass didn't date for one, and, since when could it last more than two weeks? He seemed to have changed for her. He needn't convince anyone of that anymore, lest himself. All his life, he had messed things up when they were going well. Burn all hopes and dreams to the ground forcing himself and whoever was involved to start over from the very beginning. He didn't want that to happen with Blair. He loved her. He would show her how much he truly cared._

_He reached under his bed and pulled out the old shoebox he had kept hidden for as long as he could remember. Carefully removing the lid, he saw exactly what he needed. Three hours and thirty-five hundred dollars later, he was ready to see his girlfriend of twelve whole months._

_His driver opened the door revealing the beautiful female to him. She was dressed from her head to her toe immaculately. The silky smooth fabric clung to her in all the right places hugging onto the curves her lovely figure held. Her usually bouncy auburn curls were pulled together in such a way that it seemed as if she had just stepped from her shower and walked outside looking like an angel straight from the heavens. Unlike past encounters, confidence seemed to flow from every fiber in her being just screaming the ultimate power she held within her grasp. He'd never admit it, but she left him stunned every time._

_"Wow, Waldorf, hot date tonight?" he asked_

_"Not really, just some little luncheon with a friend of mine. Thought I'd give him a taste of what he certainly isn't getting tonight," she said_

_"By the end of the night, B, you'll be singing a different tune," he said_

_"I doubt it," she said_

_"Doubt this,"_

_He tossed the small velour box pink ribbon tied straight into her lap. She stared down at it shell-shocked. It wasn't what she thought it was… was it? He chuckled and flipped the box open, effortlessly bringing a gasp from her perfectly painted lips._

_"Chuck," she breathed. He knelt down in the limo and pulled the lovely ring out of the soft velvet._

_"This was my mother's engagement ring. She got it from my father and even though, their marriage failed, this ring did not. It survived all of the trauma unscathed and I think we can do the same. I'm not asking you to marry me, just to trust me. I'm saying I promise not to hurt you, promise not to lie, promise to defend you and befriend you with my life, I promise you forever, I promise you today. Blair, will you wear my promise ring?"_

_"Yes," she reached for the ring and he gently slapped her hand. He turned it in his fingers and showed her the inscription he had engraved just that day. It read:_

_"C + B: Then, now, and forever."_

* * *

Only a month since he gave her that ring and he's already tearing apart the foundation of their relationship. The love. He can feel something in the back of his throat threatening to come up, and it's not his lunch.

"I'm sorry," he whispers

"I know," she replies just as softly

"You know, you'll always be my BlairBear,"

"And you'll always be my Chu-Chu Chuck,"

His thumb reacts quickly as yet another tear rolls down her soft cheeks. She can't believe he's doing this. How can he be so sweet when he's leaving her in less than three hours? Doesn't he know this is goodbye.

"Hey, this isn't goodbye, Blair," he says knowing what was crossing her mind.

"Face it, Bass, this is the last truck stop in Manhattan," she says

"Then let's make it a bit longer,"

He smirks and the faintest of grins flashes across her lips.

"What are you thinking?" she asks

"You, me, and Tuscany,"

"What happened to needing your education?"

"Hey, I'm Chuck Bass, I don't care about education. Who needs a future?"

"Uh, you do. And I'm not going to let you throw it away,"

"A moment ago, you were begging me to,"

"I can change my mind, Chuck. It's part of being a woman,"

"Well, I can ignore what you say. It's part of being a man,"

"You aren't a man, Chuck. You're a boy, and, right now, you need to grow up,"

He sighs and gazes into those pools of rich honey.

"Promise me you'll wait for me?"

"I don't do promises, Chuck. They never seem to work out too well,"

"I seem to remember a promise from a long time ago. We said that no matter what nothing would keep us apart for long,"

"We also said that we'd never be more than friends because I belonged to Nate and you belonged to your Georgy,"

"I was five, need I remind you what it was you said that year. I think it resembled-"

"Chuck, let's not waste any time," she interrupts. He's sure she has an ulterior motive for her sudden decision to end the conversation. However, once her perfectly, sculpted plush red lips lightly caress the delicate skin on his neck, all thoughts of motives and goodbyes are lost. It's okay, though, the last truck stop always takes a little longer than the rest.

**Fin**

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**End Author's Note:** How'd you like it? Was it good? Originally, this was just a oneshot but if you guys want more I could continue. It's just up to those of you who review, if I do.

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© Dezi. I OWN the nickname Chu-Chu Chuck and… that's it.


	2. Two

**The Last Truck Stop**

**Story Summary:** He'd always be her Chu-Chu Chuck. Bittersweet ChuckBlair.

**Genre:** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating:** T/PG-13

**Author's Starting Notes:** This is now officially either a chapter story, or like a three-shot or something. These will be short but I will keep writing them if people are reading. This is a good practice in writing in present tense as I suck in writing present tense. They have a lot of dialogue because once again, I suck at present tense and I try not to write too much in it. Just so you guys know, I wrote this like the day after the first one but I was working on other stuff and never put it on.

**Time Stamp:** Posted June 8th, 2008

* * *

**Two**:

_"I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut, My weakness is that I care too much"_

A gasp escapes her thin lips as she hears the song she vowed never to listen to again. It was _their_ song! It was a bit unconventional, sure, but, no matter what they were, they always have been. She's at the phone before the next line of the song can even finish. You have to excuse her enthusiasm, this will be the first time she truly hears his voice in two, whole years.

"Hey, B," he whispers softly the way he used to do when they were dating.

"Hey yourself," she says laughing slightly, "Pretty big surprise hearing your voice today,"

"Yeah, well, I've been busy,"

_Like that's any excuse_, she silently remarks. She can almost see him scratching the back of his neck in the way he always does when he's nervous. It doesn't look as cute when she can't see it.

"Too busy to call, Chuck? I know we like chat on AIM a few times a month, but… it's not enough, not for me at least,"

"It's not enough for me either, Blair," he admits, "I've just been busy with school and stuff,"

"You sure spend a lot of time on 'school and stuff',"

"Yeah, I do, but only because it's my education. I have to work on it,"

"No, you don't. You don't _have_ to do anything, you're just suddenly choosing to,"

That sounds a bit harsher than she expected, but it serves its purpose. Chuck finally hears her, even if it's just her frustration coming through.

"Are you mad at me or something? You said we never talk but I'm calling you, aren't I?"

"Yes, but you don't know how much I wish you called earlier. You have no idea how hard it has been over here,"

"It's been hard here too,"

"Yes, sunning and studying at your lakeside college must be so difficult, Chuck,"

She rolls her eyes.

"Just because it seems simple, doesn't mean it is! And, I have kept in touch with everyone,"

"Really? You kept in touch? So, you know that Jenny is now attending a school out there? Pursuing her fashion with the Eleanor Waldorf scholarship? Or, maybe you knew that Dan's mom moved back to the city to work at the gallery while Rufus goes on his second-no, third tour since the wedding back in junior year. Wait, I know, you spoke to my mother and now know she's engaged to Jack Roth, the guy she's been dating,"

"Wait, your mom is engaged? I didn't know it was that serious,"

"Yeah, it is. You'd know that if you kept in touch. You know, it's kind of funny really. They've been seeing each other for as long as we would have had you not left,"

"Okay, you cannot still be mad at me for that! _You_ were the one who told me to go,"

"You weren't supposed to listen!"

"You should know reverse psychology doesn't work on me, Blair,"

"Well, I didn't know that! Chuck, I prayed to every single God I knew that you would come back to me. You never did. Do you have any idea how many nights I cried after you left? Do you know how many times I bought a ticket out to California just to be in the same state as you? Do you even _care_?"

"How can you say that I don't care about you, Blair? I loved you,"

She freezes instantly hearing his words. Was that just past tense? Did he just say he _loved_ her, not _loves_? Oh, God. She feels like crying already.

"_Loved_?" she squeaks, "So, what, I'm like last season's lime green Prada bag? Old junk that you aren't quite sure what you saw in anymore? Let me guess, you went out to the Sunshine State, cruised a few beaches, and found some little _tramp_ who'll do you until you're balls your fall off?"

"No, actually, I found some snippy brunette who wouldn't spread her legs for a single soul but me, then I told her she was a whore, broke her heart, went back, scooped up the last piece of said heart after her best friend was almost done putting it together, mounted that piece on my trophy case, dated her, and, finally, I left her to think about me for two years while I tried to make myself a better person for her. … Wait, that wasn't here, that was back home,"

The tears are slowly evaporating within turning instead into anger simultaneously. He better stop soon, or else he may end up getting more than he bargained for with this call.

"You are-"

"What? Insufferable? Inhumane? An asshole? How about a bastard? No! Wait, I got it. I'm an Arabian Trainer,"

The reference to those hurtful words of his so long before cause a sharp pain to course through her starting from her heart. She doesn't let it control her though. She will _not_ let him do that to her.

Her room door opens allowing her best friend to sashay through looking very pleased with herself. Her almost smug look vanishes once she sees the pained expression on Blair's face. What happened in the ten minutes since she left? She wants to ask but the only recognition she gets from Blair is a short look that was practically pleading with her. For what, Serena isn't so sure.

"What happened to you?" Blair asks Chuck inaudibly

He pauses trying to think of an answer that might not be as hard to hear. With no success, he says, "I grew up, Blair. You should too,"

"I did grow up!" Blair shrieks frightening both Serena and Chuck with her sudden outburst, "And I grew up pretty damn fast because of you,"

Serena's eyes widen when she realizes who exactly is on the phone. She silently crosses the distance between herself and Blair and puts her ear near the phone.

"How did I make you grow up, Blair?" he asks and the girls can just see him rolling his eyes. They share a worried glance. Should she tell him?

"…"

"Yeah, that's what I thought. Saying things just for the sake of conversation isn't necessary, Blair,"

"It's not just for damn conversation, Bass. I did have to grow up. I've spent the last year, three months, and nine days growing up in ways you can't even imagine,"

"Well, I'm sure you'll enlighten me later. Look, I didn't call for us to fight. I just called to let you know that… that… that I'm probably not going to come home until after college is out. If I go home, I'm not going to want to come back, and I just love the school here so much,"

"Oh, you mean the university you signed up for knowing good and well that there was no chance any one else would be allowed to go to but Nate. Speaking of your 'best friend', have you spoken to him at all in the last year? I'm sure you haven't, so, let me tell you that he and S are together. They have been since about five months after you left. I'm pretty positive you didn't know that,"

"Maybe I don't care about Nathaniel's love life. You probably still do though,"

"No, _Charles_, I don't. There are only two men in this world I obsess over and neither of them have Archibald DNA,"

"Wait, two… did you, did you find someone, B? Someone else?"

Serena unknowingly scoffs at how idiotic Blair's ex- it is ex, right? -boyfriend truly is. The two years down in California obviously didn't teach him a thing.

"No. I could never love anyone but you. Not like you care anyway. I mean, this _is_ the first time we've spoken since you left,"

"You could have called me too, Blair," he insists defensively

"I did!" she yells outraged, "I called you, Chuck. I called you for months. You just never, _ever_ answered my calls. You were always 'busy with school and stuff'. What's the point in having a fucking phone if you won't answer it, Chuck!"

Serena sighs knowing where this is going. It's confession time.

"Blair, calm down,"

"I will not bloody calm down!" Blair's pissed now. How dare he treat her this way? After all the time and effort she spent on him and his damn-uhh!

"Did you just say blo-"

"Shut up! You are without a doubt the biggest piece of horseshit on this Earth. And you reside in the lowest, deepest, most disgusting, shit-hole in the universe, excluding the Humphrey loft - _"Blair!"_. You got to say what you wanted to say earlier, Chuck. Well, now, I'm going to say what I've been _dying_ to say for the longest time. Actually, someone else will,"

Chuck can just feel the hairs on the back of his neck stand up when he hears her hostile, almost vengeful voice. He's obviously pushed one too many of her buttons during the call. Was it really that serious? She's just being so… impossible. And, really, what has she been dying to say for the longest time? He really, _really_ wants to know. Until a new voice speaks, now, suddenly, he doesn't want to hear it. The words she says make his blood run cold. He almost drops the phone as the reality of the question sinks into his brain.

"Guess you don't handle your business as well as you thought, eh, Bass?" Serena asks spitefully smirking as she looks at the two people across the room from her. Without even waiting, she hangs up leaving Chuck with nothing but the dial tone and his conflicting thoughts.

* * *

© Dezi. While everything above was written by myself, the characters and the world they live in was not. I don't own GossipGirl, or the brilliant quote that inspired the last quote of this chapter. Sorry for the confusion.


	3. Three

**The Last Truck Stop**

**Story Summary:** He'd always be her Chu-Chu Chuck. Bittersweet ChuckBlair.

**Genre:** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating:** T/PG-13

**Author's Starting Notes:** I love you guys, really I do. For two chapters, I have twenty-two reviews! I looked at that and felt like fainting. Kind of like how Blair feels in this chapter. I know this one is short (as are the others) but there's something in this chapter I want you to pick up and it's not the _Juno_ reference I threw in. Okay, now, go ahead and read it, you know you want to.

**Time Stamp:** Posted July 17th, 2008

* * *

**Three:**

Tears fill her vision as she realizes just who has been knocking at her door. Brown meets brown and the tears start pouring out. His strong arms scoop up her falling form instantly. She's amazed with how right his hold feels even now. Two years, two _long_ years, and she's feeling him for the first time. His lips, the ones that feel so foreign to her touch now, graze the skin on her forehead. She pulls back and looks him over. He looks as if he hasn't slept in months even though it's only been about two days since their phone call. His eyes roam the room frantically and she knows what he's doing.

"Serena isn't here. Don't worry, she won't kill you… yet,"

He sighs dropping his bag to the ground. He tries to step forward into the home. Blair will have nothing of it. She blocks the doorway.

"Come on, Blair, let me in," he says

"I did that before, Chuck, way too many times. Each time, I ended up hurt. Don't do this to me, not again," she says. He looks ready to say something in response but he stops himself. Good choice.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asks. Okay, maybe he should have said whatever he was going to before. Her eyes ignite with a dangerous passion and he unconsciously takes a step back.

"Better question, Chuck, why didn't you know?" she asks

"Because you never told me," he says as if it's obvious

"No," she shakes her head the way you would when explaining something to a child, "Because your stubborn ass never came home. You could have. You could have hopped on a plane and flown by. Just to say, 'hello, Blair, remember me?' I wouldn't have thrown you out. In fact, I probably would have thrown you a welcome home party,"

"Well, let's discuss party plans then," he says

"No! I'm not throwing you a party. You didn't come home because you wanted to. You came home because you felt you should. You felt you needed to be there, be here. I don't need you anymore. And you've already proven how much you need me," she says

"Blair… what will it take for you to let me in the house?" he asks

"You have to promise that you will leave. You have to promise me that no matter what you see, you will go back to California and finish what you love so much more than me,"

He winces as she says that. He doesn't love anything more than her. When he voices it, however, she just scoffs.

"Of course, I'm your everything, right? You've used the line before. Remember? After Amelia, you told me that it was a fluke, a mistake in your judgment, a chance to grab hold of what you weren't ready to let go. You said I was your everything, and you loved nothing more than me. I guess California is nothing then,"

"Why are you acting like this, Blair?"

"I guess it's just the hormones, Chuck. Giving you a taste of what you missed a year ago,"

"Blair, I really need you to understand where I'm coming from,"

"And I need you to promise me and get the hell out of my life. I'm sick of waiting for things that won't come. I spent most of my life waiting for Nate to be my prince charming. Then, I was waiting for you to accept change and be with me. Then came waiting one more freaking time for you to come back home. Now, I just want to be done waiting for you to leave,"

"Are you bitter about me leaving? Is that what this is?"

"No, Chuck, it's about me having to wait a year, three months, and eleven days to tell you that you're a father,"

"…"

"Speechless? Yeah, I thought you would be. You could have come home, Chuck. You didn't though,"

"How long? How long after I left did you know?"

"Two months. I called you that day. You didn't answer, ha, obviously,"

"Who did you tell first? Serena, right?"

"Who else, Chuck?" she asks sarcastically.

* * *

_"S, I'm pregnant," Blair said almost as soon as the blonde had answered the phone._

_"What?" Serena asked_

_"I'm pregnant. Gosh, don't act like this was a surprise,"_

_"Uh, B, are you sure? Maybe it's a food baby!"_

_"To have a food baby, you'd actually have to eat food, Serena,"_

_"True…. So, it is Chuck's, right?"_

_"Of course!" Blair yelled outraged_

_"Sorry, last time I assumed and was wrong. It was just a precaution. So… are you going to tell him?"_

_"No,"_

_"And why not?"_

_"Because it's not exactly something you say over AIM, S. I'll just wait until he comes home to tell him,"_

_"Why not call him?"_

_"He won't answer,"_

_"That's strange. He answered for Nate yesterday,"_

_"What did he say?"_

_"Nothing really, just talked about California and asked about you,"_

_"If he's asking, why doesn't he just come and see?"_

_"He's Chuck Bass. He always does things differently,"_

_"You got that right…. Serena, I don't know what to do,"_

_"Well, I do. Hop on a plane, fly out there, bring his ass home, and raise your son together,"_

_"Son? How do you know it won't be a girl?"_

_"Because, Blair, you'd probably have a heart attack if they told you it was a girl. You've wanted a son since the second grade when you grew out of the 'Ooh, dress up' stage,"_

_"Actually, I stopped wanting children in eighth grade for a while. Didn't exactly like the idea of getting fat and pushing crap out of my body,"_

_"Too bad! You are having a Bass baby,"_

_"What if… what if Chuck doesn't come back?"_

_"Then you'll have me, Nate and Baby to keep you company,"_

_"Oh, joy,"_

* * *

"Does Nate know?" Chuck asks

"Of course! He was there when I delivered," Blair says

"Why didn't he tell me?" Chuck asks downcast

"It wasn't his place to tell you that you had a kid,"

"…. What'd you have? A boy or a girl?"

"See for yourself,"

Blair steps aside. Chuck walks into the penthouse and is about to ask where to go when a loud sound echoes throughout. Blair sighs and rushes off into the room that used to be a study. A crib is situated in the corner and within said crib is the most beautiful _girl_, Chuck has ever seen; well, second.

He watches in awe as Blair scoops her daughter - _their_ daughter - into her arms. Blair moves fluidly in a circle rocking the little cutie gently as she does so. He notes silently that she seems to be a pro at silencing the young one. Even though he knows he fits into the picture, he's not exactly sure how. Chuck almost feels as if he's intruding on a moment. He feels angry suddenly. No one should feel out of place around their own child. He should have come back. He should have just ignored Nate and came back anyway. The only question was: why didn't he?

* * *

© Dezi. While everything above was written by myself, the characters and the world they live in was not. I don't own GossipGirl, _Juno_, or AOL Instant Messenger. I do, however, own the plot which grows with every single review I get. If I were you, I'd start commenting.

* * *

Hey, guys, if by chance you have any free time, you might want to check out my new forum. It's a GossipGirl forum that you can access by going to my profile and clicking on the "My Forums" space right before the actual profile begins. It's got discussions and some roleplaying for those of you who are into it. It'd be really cool if you checked it out.


	4. Three's Forgotten Scene

**The Last Truck Stop**

**Story Summary:** He'd always be her Chu-Chu Chuck. Bittersweet ChuckBlair.

**Genre:** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating:** T/PG-13

**Author's Starting Notes:** It wasn't until it was too late that I realized I had forgotten part of the last chapter. I wanted to put it on then but my friend had my flash drive, which held the actual story. I was angry, but, I waited. Here it is guys, the reason Chuck was away most of the time. It's super small, but it leads into the next chapter.

**Time Stamp:** Posted July 23rd, 2008

* * *

**Forgotten Scene from Chapter Three:**

_"_In the face of true love, you don't give up, even if the object of your affection is begging you to._ Bullshit!" Chuck snarled moodily looking over his latest text message. What was the world coming to where a man could fly all the way across the country only to be knocked on his ass? It just wasn't right. It just wasn't right! Quickly, he replied to the message by repeating what he said before._

_**I'm home. How's my girl? -C**_

_**Fine. Might as well go back to CA. -N**_

_**I just flew all the way out here. Why the fuck would I go back? -C**_

_**Because you should -N**_

_**Why? -C**_

_**Well, she's really happy right now, it's almost as if she has new life. On top of that, she's not here -N**_

_**Where is she? -C**_

_**A meeting of sorts -N**_

_**By meeting do you mean a meeting with one guy or with a bunch of suit clad guys? -C**_

…_**One -N**_

_**Answer your phone. -C**_

_**What? -N**_

_**Answer your fucking phone. -C**_

_If ever a text message conversation could piss a guy off that much, Chuck's conversation with Nate would be it. He needed to hear the boy's voice to make sure his friend wasn't just joking with him. When Nate first said to go home, Chuck thought his friend was just being an ass. Now, he had to hope that his first assumption was true. He dialed in the number he memorized by heart and heard the impatient voice of Nathaniel Archibald on the other line._

_"What, Chuck? I already told you everything you need to know," Nate said crabbily_

_"Hold your horses, man. I just left California and came out here, paying my own way for once, economy class, just to see Blair. Now, why the hell can't I see her?" Chuck asked._

_"Because, like I said, she's at a meeting," Nate said_

_"With a guy! Who is this guy?" Chuck asked_

_"A doctor," Nate said_

_"Is she sick?" Chuck asked feeling worried suddenly_

_"No. She went to see him on her own free will, during her own free time, just to see him," Nate said. Chuck stayed silent unaware of what to say as a comeback to that. His girl, the girl that was supposed to wait for him was out with another guy, and a fucking doctor at that._

_"How long has this been going on?" Chuck asked barely audible in his current state_

_"About two months," Nate replied, "I-I, um, I'm thinking you should probably go back to California. It'd be easier for the both of you that way."_

_"Yeah, maybe," Chuck whispered_

_"You could still see her, man, if you want. She'll be with the doctor for another hour or two, but after that, hey, who knows?" Nate added in whimsically_

_"Nah, I think I'm just going to meet up with Bart and discuss Victrola, then head out. He could think this was a business trip. Could you do me a favor though, Nate?" Chuck asked_

_"Sure, anything, Chuck,"_

_"Don't… don't tell Blair I came out here. She deserves to be happy, even if I'm not in the picture,"_

_"You really love her, don't you?"_

_"…. Later Nate,"_

* * *

Chuck shakes off the memory feeling angry and stupid at the same time. Blair hadn't betrayed their love. She was at an appointment about the baby that day. How could he have been so stupid to believe the worst? Blair loved him. It is past tense, right? She doesn't love him anymore… does she?

He looks up from his hands only to find her coming towards him with their daughter in her arms.

"Chuck, I'd like you to meet someone very important," Blair begins. However, before she can get any farther Chuck's phone rings. He doesn't need to look at it. He knows by the ringtone who's calling him. And, boy, does he have a few words for dear Nathaniel.

* * *

© Dezi. While everything above was written by myself, the characters and the world they live in was not. I don't own GossipGirl, _Juno_, or AOL Instant Messenger. I do, however, own the plot which grows with every single review I get. If I were you, I'd start commenting.


	5. Four

**The Last Truck Stop**

**Story Summary:** He'd always be her Chu-Chu Chuck. Bittersweet ChuckBlair.

**Genre:** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating:** T/PG-13

**Author's Starting Notes:** This chapter has been among my list of to-dos since before I posted the forgotten piece of the last chapter. I kept revising what I wanted to say again and again, until I ended up with half of this. Actually, no, I ended up with half a page of writing (which is everything up to the buddy part of the conversation). I actually sat down October 11th (that would be the day I'm writing this as well) to focus on it. After maybe an hour of reading, revising, and eating sandwiches, I have an emotional chapter with a very awkward ending note. Happy thing, I think I know how to start my next chapter and will be ready with that shortly. I can even tell you the starting line for the next chapter… but I won't. Enjoy!

**Time Stamp:** Posted October 12th, 2008

* * *

**Chapter Four:**

Somehow, he finds that there isn't a good way to describe the anger coursing through his body. He can't grab control for he knows if he does, he might just forgive Nate too easily. You see, Chuck has come to a conclusion. Nate is an asshole. He may pretend not to be, but he is. And, Chuck wants nothing more than to expose Nate for being exactly what so many people resent about Chuck. So, he picks up the phone and puts it to his ear.

"Hey, man, what's it like in Cali?" Nate asks, carefree as ever

"I wouldn't know. Actually, I don't know a lot of things, like what ever happened to that darling, little conversation we had a while back," Chuck says, his voice so level he gives nothing away

"What conversation?" Nate asks

"Oh, just that one where you told me about why California was such a great place, and how lucky I was to _not_ be back home," Chuck says

"Still not getting it," Nate admits. Chuck rolls his eyes. Either Nate is an idiotic asshole, or a brilliant one. Chuck's pretty sure it's the first one.

"Okay, let me go through this slowly, Nate. Two months after I left, business trip, home, busy people, you. Now, do you get what I'm talking about?" Chuck asks

"Not really," Nate answers

"I'M TALKING ABOUT THE TIME WHEN YOUR STUPID ASS TOLD ME BLAIR DIDN'T WANT TO SEE ME!!" Chuck roars startling both the females he forgot were in the room. Instantly, the youngest starts crying causing the eldest to look at him surprised.

"Chuck, who are you talking to?" Blair questions bouncing the little tike to try and quiet her down

"No one," he tells her quickly, "_You_ are dead," he tells Nate angrily

"Chuck, what are you talking about? I never told you Blair didn't want to see you," Nate says

"Oh, you didn't? So, I just imagined the entire phone call when I came home and was told that Blair was doing a doctor and not to even bother trying to see her? Because I know I don't like myself that much, but my subconscious wouldn't be that cruel to me," Chuck spits. There is a moment of silence. It dawns on Chuck that Nate must be remembering the conversation.

"Buddy, I-"

"Buddy? _Buddy!_ How can you even think about calling me 'Buddy' after what you did!" Chuck hisses glaring at a spot on the wall harshly. Nate is very lucky that he isn't in the room right then. Chuck surely would punch him if he was.

"I was protecting Blair. Doing what was best for her, for you too," Nate says. By his tone, Chuck deduces that Nate is actually serious.

"How is keeping me away from Blair and _my_ daughter supposed to be best for anyone?" asks Chuck rhetorically, "You may have been my friend, Nathaniel," (At the sound of his name, Blair gasps.) "But that gives you no right to intrude in my life the way you did,"

Blair silently nods agreeing with the one-sided conversation she is hearing. She's not so sure whether she's as mad at Chuck as she used to be. It feels all the more natural to want to kill Nate all of a sudden. Deciding one side isn't enough for her, she moves closer to Chuck in hopes of hearing Nate talk as well.

"Like it would have made a difference," mutters Nate spitefully

"Excuse you," Chuck says powerfully having heard Nate's barely audible remark perfectly

"You obviously heard me, Chuck. I know you, man. You claimed to have felt such emotion for Blair, but we both know that you weren't after a life with her. If you had been, you would have taken her with you," Nate states matter-o-factly. Blair takes a small step backward. _Is Nate right?_ She wonders.

"I was as serious about Blair then as I was all those years ago when I told you that I hated your mom's cooking," Chuck declares

"Last time you said that we were five, Chuck," Nate points out

"I'm aware of that. Did I ever eat anything your mom made after that?"

"She refused to cook for you after that. She heard you say it!"

"Exactly, Nathaniel. A-and what gives you the right to gauge my feelings for me? Did you not think I meant it when I said I loved Blair and that I was stupid to do so, but okay with it anyway? Or was my word choice to difficult for your little, blonde head?" Chuck asks

"That's rich, Chuck. At least my 'little, blonde head' seemed to have been enough to still stay in this zip code. Or, was it just Daddy sick of you that had you packing your bags?" retorts Nate cruelly. Chuck's anger level rises even more. For a moment, Blair considers turning away. It is kind of wrong for her to be there. A private discussion between two feuding friends should never be overheard by the ex-girlfriend, or the daughter. However, she finds that she's as drawn to the conversation as she is to the man before her. So, she stays.

"At least I know that when my daddy goes on a business trip, he'll return. Yours seems to have been gone for nearly three years now, Nate," Chuck laughs, "Ah, where is he this time? Hiding from the police in Alaska? No, that was over shortly after I graduated. Better go broad so as not to give away too much. Europe? Asia? Hell, is he even on Earth anymore?"

"You're a bastard," Nate utters in a surprisingly level voice

"You got the first syllable right. And, like a true Bass man, I feel it is only proper to tell you that all ties from hence forth are to be severed. Sorry, I mean, this friendship is _over_," Chuck concludes.

This time, Nate laughs. It isn't a laugh like the kind the one-year-old gives when treated to a ride on the swings down the street. Oh, no, within this outward manifestation of delight is a pained sense of reality. Almost as if Nate is backing up the sentence Chuck finished only moments before. From there, Blair stops listening. She hears nothing of Nate's following words. She doesn't recognize Chuck hanging up the phone and hastily stashing it in his pocket as if the very device burned him the way Nate had. She only has her thoughts, her questions.

_Is it really over?_ She wonders. And, somehow, that question brings up more than just thoughts of friendships past.

* * *

_"I want Chuck," she said._

_The other parties in the room had to stop themselves from showing their shock. It was the first time in months anyone had heard her say those words. She had ranted about how she hated him, how she missed him, how she loved him even; never once did she say that she wanted him. It was implied, of course. Underneath every sentence she said that involved him, there was a silent plea for his return to come. Hearing her say it, then of all times, was something entirely different._

_"What did you say?" Serena asked just to clarify_

_"I want Chuck. I want my boyfriend back. I want the guy who smiles at me and makes me glad to be alive. I want the man whose very presence lights my entire body on fire…. Serena, why do I want him? Why?"_

_Serena van der Woodsen said nothing in response. She had nothing to say. Truthfully, she also felt that Blair was more thinking aloud than actually asking a question._

_"He didn't treat me right," Blair continued as if no one else was around, "Except for when he treated me amazingly. He didn't know how to hold me, until I bent to fit his shape. He couldn't speak to me correctly. So, we just made our own language. But, he was the only one who could see me. He could hear me, feel me, touch me. He knew me, S. Then, he left me. He left me with no one."_

_Tears pooled together behind her eyelids, begging to fall and relinquish the pain she felt inside. Unlike most times, she let them. She closed her eyes, and freed the drops of anguish. To her, she was almost always alone. Without Chuck, she was nothing. _

_At that point in time, it mattered not that her mother, her best friend, her first ex-boyfriend, and her nanny were there to witness her breakdown. How could it? All she could hear were the cries of her broken heart. It screamed for him every day and every night. Her body ached for his touch. Her mind yearned for his witty remarks. Her ears longed to hear his voice. And, her eyes bled without seeing his lean form. Pictures, videos, and small online chats could not stop the pain she felt. He'd been gone for six months. She'd been missing him for six months, four days, twelve hours, and thirty-three minutes. She was counting somewhere in her mind. It gave her something to focus on other than him, and other than _her_._

_Then, tears still flowing down her porcelain cheeks like rain on the windowpane, breath as shallow and rapid as if she was lifting ten times her weight, she rounded on them, all of them. She looked at the four with eyes as pained and empty as she was, and asked:_

_"Is it really over?"_

_No one could answer her._

* * *

It isn't until she feels coldness on her cheek that she realizes she is crying. She curses herself for being so weak as to let a memory affect her so. She's kind of glad that Chuck has always been oblivious. It lets him think he and Nate did this to her, not her own thoughts of abandonment.

"I'm sorry, Blair. You weren't supposed to hear that," he says. She gives him a suffering sigh. Not as part of an act, but for her own sake. She can feel her heart pounding strongly within her rib cage and knows it probably won't take much for her to be in tears again.

"It's fine," she says shortly

"No, it isn't. That… that was between me and Nate and I shouldn't have made it so that you had to hear that. If possible, I'd like to go back to where we were before Nate called,"

There he is giving her an out, a chance to take the reigns of the situation once more. Instantly, she takes it. She steps even closer to him - if that's possible when you're literally face to face - and looks down at her daughter. It only takes a small glance at the little girl to bring a ghost of a smile back to the brunette's face.

"Chuck Bass, I'd like you to meet your daughter, Matteson Antoinette Bass," Blair says looking at him more than her. She can see his features soften and his eyes glaze over in a way she hadn't seen in so long. If she didn't know better, she would be expecting tears to flow from him next. Instead, his posture goes rigid and he clears his throat.

"That's, um, that's a lovely name, Blair," he says, his voice betraying the stiffness his body demands.

"Thanks. I really loved the name Tess, and I heard that your mom's middle name was Antoinette. I think the Bass part is pretty self-explanatory," she explains. He nods, his gaze going back to the toddler in her arms. Matteson fits the girl perfectly. He doesn't know how he couldn't have seen it before. Her face, her hair, her clothes, all scream Waldorf. He begins to wonder if there was anything she got from him. Then, her eyelids flutter revealing a set of charcoal eyes that can only mean one thing.

"She's got your eyes," Blair adds, seeing the ice melt once more, "I'm pretty sure she'll be as disgustingly Bass as you were when you were her age,"

"And how would you know?" Chuck asks, "We didn't meet until I was six,"

"Yeah, and, when we did, you told me that bologna about your mother's plane crash,"

"Bologna? What do you mean? What I said was true," he insists. She scoffs and shifts the baby to her other arm.

"You don't have to lie to me anymore. I know the truth. She didn't die in a plane crash that brought you to the Upper East Side to get away. She died giving birth to you in a home birth twenty miles south of Orlando, Florida," Blair tells him. He stares at her, mouth agape. In all the years they had known each other, he never once told her that. He never told anyone. Well, no one important at least. That thought led to him coming to a very surprising conclusion.

"M-my dad told you," Chuck declares, eyes even wider than before. Blair only nods. "When?"

"The day I told him," Blair admits

"Told him what?" Chuck asks, fearing the answer. _Please tell me, she didn't tell my father. Oh, please tell me_, he inwardly pleaded.

"That I was carrying his first grandchild, of course,"

And, just like that, Chuck is sure he has taken in all his brain will allow.

* * *

© Dezi. While everything above was written by myself, the characters and the world they live in was not. I don't own GossipGirl, or AOL Instant Messenger. I do, however, own the plot, which grows with every single review I get. If I were you, I'd start commenting.


	6. Five

**The Last Truck Stop**

**Story Summary:** He'd always be her Chu-Chu Chuck. Bittersweet ChuckBlair.

**Genre:** Romance/Hurt/Comfort

**Rating:** T/PG-13

**Author's Starting Notes:** Okay, so, I've been meaning to write this chapter since I updated the last one. My go to for this was that Chuck talks to Bart and it prompts him to action. Somehow, I ended up with this. This chapter is rated PG, or PG-13, for mentions of eating disorders that came from nowhere.

**Time Stamp:** Posted December 1, 2008

**

* * *

Chapter Five:**

Of all the things Bart Bass had never done for his son, or had kept from him, this has to be undoubtedly the worst. How could he keep Matteson from Chuck? The girl is precious. She is everything a guy could ever want in a daughter. And Chuck has already missed so much. Her first smile, her first laugh, the first time she ever opened her eyes, her first haircut, her first everything almost. Every little occasion that makes up being a parent in those early stages has passed and gone without him. He feels as empty as the promise he had made to Blair to call every day back when he first left. He knows that the only way to fill the void entails spending time with his daughter and the love of his life. He also knows that doing so will only remind him more of all that he has missed. He settles for questioning his father.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asks loudly, pushing through the door to his father's bedroom. Bart looks up, unamused and unaffected by Chuck's presence.

"Tell you what, Charles?" Bart inquires

"That I had a kid! Why am I just now finding out? After I missed so much of her life," Chuck proclaims

"It wasn't my place to tell you," Bart explains

"Why isn't it anyone's place to tell me about my daughter?" Chuck roars

"Because it's your place to know. When your mother was pregnant, I knew," Bart says

"Probably had her pee checked every few weeks knowing your tendencies to control everything," Chuck mutters

"That was uncalled for," Bart chastises

"So is the secrecy! When did Blair tell you? When did you know that you had a grandchild coming your way?"

Bart hesitates.

"Four months in," he answers

"Four months! You couldn't just drop a hint to me that maybe I should come home? Was my happiness so unnecessary to you?"

"You always seemed happy to me, Charles."

"I was never happy! I spent a year thinking that Blair had moved on and was dating a fricken doctor! How could I be happy thinking that the woman I loved was interested in someone else?"

"Why didn't you return then?"

"I wanted her to be happy. It didn't seem like I was in that picture anymore."

Bart rolls his eyes.

"And here I was thinking college would make you smarter," Bart says, "You are an idiot, son. That girl has been in love with you for as long as I can remember."

Chuck scoffs.

"Right, and she was just fawning over Nate to make me jealous," he says

"She might have been. I could always tell that there was something between you and Blair that went deeper than her and Nathaniel. Even back when you two were just two middle schoolers flipping through magazines and eating ice cream, I knew. But do you know what really cemented it?" Bart asks

"The sonogram she probably showed you to convince you," Chuck suggests

"No. It was the day I came home early from a business trip when you guys were fifteen. Harold and Eleanor were fighting a lot that year, and she was hiding from them at our place," Bart recalls, "You remember."

Chuck nods absently. He can remember a lot of things from those days. He remembers one particularly well.

_

* * *

Chuck Bass would always be Chuck Bass. Through every obstacle he faced, he would still have his scarf and his trademark smirk. He even slept with the dignity and pride he sported daily. He was just the kind of guy that didn't break down for any one thing. The only thing that even got pass the surface layer was a young brunette who was sleeping right beside him. Or used to be._

_The flush of a toilet roused the boy from his sleep. He looked towards his bathroom. Usually, girls just left his home. Since when did anyone use his bathroom? He was tempted to call for some help from downstairs but halted himself when he caught sight of a familiar slipper on the floor._

_He nodded to himself slowly. Blair was staying with him. And, from the sound of it, she had needed to use the restroom. He leaned back, collecting all his jokes about bed-wetting and bathroom breaks. This task also fell apart when he had the sound of retching. He was no stranger to the sounds of hurling, having done his fair share when he first started drinking._

_"But Blair doesn't drink," he mumbled, "She also didn't eat at dinner."_

_A thought came to him instantly. He wanted to shake it away and pretend it could never happen but two words were dancing before his eyelids like a drunken Georgina._

Eating disorder.

_He pushed himself from his bed and darted to the bathroom. He flung the door open just in time to see the girl with the pretty brown ringlets forcing her finger down her throat. She looked up at him._

_"Blair, what are you doing?" he asked. Her eyes widened, as if his voice was a sign that everything was really wrong. She scooted closed to the wall._

_"Go away!" she commanded_

_"No," he told her._

_"I don't want you to come over here," she said_

_"It's my house," he reminded her. She stood up to look threatening. Her mission failed instantly with her puffy eyes, shriveled fingers, and short height, but she didn't take mind. She glared at him. He stepped closer. They repeated this until he was only a few feet away._

_"Stay away from me!" she shrieked. He stopped and stood._

_"How long has this been going on Blair?" he asked_

_"What been going on? Nothing is going on," she insisted_

_"You're making yourself sick in my bathroom. Of course something is going on," he said_

_"I'm not making myself sick! I had some of the tuna your chef made for dinner and felt sick. I shouldn't have tried the fish, that's all," she said_

_"Radolpho made tuna yesterday. He made soup this evening, especially for your loss of appetite."_

_"I'm fine, Chuck."_

_"I never said you weren't."_

_"Then what are you saying?"_

_"Nothing. I'm just wondering how long you've been doing this to your body."_

_"I'm not doing anything to my body."_

_"Blair, tell me," he pleaded_

_"There's nothing happening!"_

_"Blair," he warned_

_"Fine, Chuck! Two years. Ever since Mom and Dad started fighting over me," she admitted begrudgingly, "They are always fighting about me! I started the flood gates for fights about everything. Mom would always say how fat I was and how I was making problems for her line by not being perfect. Dad would say that I was. And, they would just fight more about other stuff. It's all my fault. They're going to divorce, and it's all my fault!" Blair shrieked.  
_

_Chuck shook his head._

_"It's not your fault," he told her. She rolled her eyes at him furiously.  
_

_"The hell it isn't! I ruined my parents marriage. They would be better off without me. But, because I can't kill myself. I'll just look better. When I'm prettier, they won't fight about me anymore. And, Eleanor will compliment me, and Daddy will take me to the ice rink where we'll skate like there's no tomorrow. Everyone will smile and watch us, because I'll be so beautiful."_

_"Blair, you are beautiful. You're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen," he complimented truthfully.  
_

_Blair scoffed._

_"Yeah right. You've been with women twelve times better looking than me. I'm surprised you haven't already left me for Serena. _She_'s pretty."_

_"Serena is okay, I guess. But, you, Blair, you're amazing. Your body, spirit, and mind are gorgeous."_

_"I don't believe you," Blair stammered_

_"But it's the truth," he stressed_

_"It never is. All guys lie. All of you, even Nate. He told me he loved me today. He doesn't. He loves Serena. I know it, and I accept it because she's beautiful. When I'm like that, he'll tell me again. He will," Blair said_

_"Fine, Blair, I won't tell you you're beautiful anymore. If you're not going to listen, I won't waste my breath," he said_

_"Good!"_

_"Can we at least go back to bed? We have school tomorrow. Last day, it'll be fun," he said without the typical happiness. She slowly nodded._

_"Fine, but this conversation never happened," she hissed pushing passed him back into his bedroom._

_"Fine by me," he mumbled following behind her._

_He laid in bed, minutes before his alarm clock would go off to wake up the sleeping girl next to him, confused and frightened. Blair had a problem. Blair had a big problem. And, he didn't know if he could help her with it. She had sounded so sure of everything she said, like she was explaining something simple and true instead of made up reality. He knew there wasn't much he could do. No one he could talk to, except…. He grabbed Blair's phone, going to her fourth speed dial._

_"Hey, Dorota? Uh, no, this is Chuck. Look, I have to tell you something about Blair…. You may want to sit down. You're not going to like this one."_

* * *

"Charles. Charles. Chuck!"

Chuck shakes his head to clear away the memories.

"Uh, sorry," Chuck mumbles

"Did you hear anything I said?" Bart asks, obviously frustrated

"Everything, sir," Chuck says

"I said that Blair always cared for you. She would never do anything meant to harm you. And, you never intended to hurt her. Like that time I was telling you about," Bart says

"What time was that?" Chuck asks

"The time where you spent the entire day helping her when she was sick. It was almost nauseating for me to be near the girl. She sure did have a weak stomach back then," Bart adds. Chuck contains a smirk. It looks like there are some things even the great Bart Bass doesn't know. And, some things that the good Chuck Bass doesn't want to. Just thinking of what followed his little flashback makes his blood chill. All the fights, delusions, and therapy sessions he listened to, heard about, and was a part of. The sound of vomit brings a pain to his chest these days. Maybe there was one good thing that came out of the secrecy after all. He isn't so sure he could have taken hearing his Blair throw up every morning.

_My Blair? Is she really mine? Surely not after all this time. She's got to be busy with some other man now. But she did say that she hadn't been with anyone after me. Does that mean that maybe I still have a chance? I can win her back. No, I have to win her back. We've been apart long enough. It's time for this train to pull back into that old station, once and for all. And, I know just how to do it._

* * *

©Dezi. While I wrote everything above, the basis for it does not belong to me. I don't own Gossip Girl, The Upper East Side, or its characters. I do, however, own the plot, which grows with every single review I get. If I were you, I'd start commenting.


End file.
